Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
