Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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