i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
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