Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
