bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
