Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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