Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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