If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
