im drinking this country out of the recession.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
