I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize
