Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
