I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
You know, be my cock's hype man.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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