You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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