the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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