my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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