You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Buhtt sex?
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
