apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
