its not stalking. its research.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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