We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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