everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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