So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
