he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
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