Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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