Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
