I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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