Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
