how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
