Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
