I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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