I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
