Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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