It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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