pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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