from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
