I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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