If i come over, it means nothing
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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