Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I am one with the molecules
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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