Well apparently he's into motor boating.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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