i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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