farters have to be the big spoon...
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
