That's intense
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
