This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
