Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
