I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
