Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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