Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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