I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
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