Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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