She's JV to your varsity
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize
