I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
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